Embarrassing D;

Embarrassing moments.
How do I sum these up... Well basically they make me want to literally die. Sometimes I think about these embarrassing moments and cringe at the thought of them.
I don't like doing this, it makes me remember when I was stupid. I don't feel like feeling stupid, just like everyone else.
One of these memories of being embarrassed sticks out like a sore thumb.

I must certainly not going to tell you what it is, false hope right there.
But, when I do think about it I do realise how truely stupid I was, I was wrong and I know I hurt two people in the process of this. The one year anniversary of this is coming up soon and it's going to be like cringe, cringe, cringe.

This memory is a mix of an embarrassing moment and heartbreak.
I still feel bad and I wish they could understand.

You get me?

A familiar noise

Today I heard a much familar noise. The noise of birds beautiful song, but as they are on a warm, sunny day.
It reminded me of times in Australia, on the warm sunny evenings when the birds are still out and singing songs when they actually should be in their nests.
It reminded of evenings in my hometown with my friends, messing about as usual and hearing these birds and feeling comforted because you know if the birds are still out, it doesn't matter if you are.
Contradiction?

It reminds me of warm feelings that sadly I do not feel right now. I feel darkness, sadness.
I wish I could feel the warmth of happiness, love..

Someone provide me with these feelings, don't make me feel sad anymore.
It's these crushes that make me feel like this, maybe I should really stop looking for 'love' and let it find me. No matter how long it takes, I should take a seat back in this 'love life' of mine.

I love how I go off the subject completely.

Friendships and Hardships.

Breathe in, breathe out. Let's do something different.
Inspirational lyrics.

Makes me want to go out and do more. Be free, stop going to the old park and town. DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT.
Let's get all the pennys we have together and go on a train to a new town and meet new people.
Create new friendships and love. But also keeping the old relationships in the process.


Memories that will last till our days of pensions and walking sticks.
New love that will have a lasting impact on the rest of your life for the good.
Friends that will do anything for you, all the cliches you can think of.

Just don't let go, of all the memories and connections with have now, cause in the future we will be making new ones with maybe you or different people. We may forget because our brains are so little we can't squeeze all these amazing memories in one little organ.

Am I making sense?

Loss

I lost one follower makes me sad that I'm not satisfying the readers of this blog.
Give me idea's? At the moment I kind of have writers block it's horrible.
I'll think of something.
PROMISE

Ditching

I'm kinda ditching this blog for LiveJournal.
But I prefer this blog anyway so I have no idea why?

Well right now I just can't stop thinking about this firey haired boy and I can't wait for maths tomorrow to see him, hehe.

Loss of respect

Okay so I saw my friend do something I shouldn't of.
She has been with her boyfriend for a whole year and then I see her kiss some other guy while I was kind of, sort of spying on her with my other friend. How bad does this sound.

Fuck, what do I say.

HARD WORK PAYING OFF

My wage for the month is £100 they have now given it a raise as I'm working so hard.
I'M SO EXCITED FOR PAYDAY!

Strangers

This is what I shall name this photo, how I was feeling when I took this photo, we barely know each other anymore yet I know you so well...



How confusing and artsy fasty do I sound?

Anger

I really need to control my anger sometimes, I just got angry at my friend Kate for no reason and hung up on her while she was talking to me.
She's meant to be coming round to my house later on as well. :S

I'M AN IDIOT.

A little thing

I have a little thing for this ginger guy in my maths class, I love talking to him, kinda makes my heart flutter AND him and his girlfriend recently split.
I might start worming myself in his life, hehehe. Let's see how this goes >.<

Gimme some lovin'

Where is the love for Jessica?
I never seem to get a break when it comes to love. If I do find someone it just ends badly or they don't like me back.
There is no point in me trying. Maybe I should stop looking and love will find me? I really hope so.

Unhappy

It's not nice hearing the person you kinda like rant on about all these girls he likes is it really?

Aboard

I really want to live in Hong Kong or Tokyo. Or even the chance of visiting those places would be amazing. Just the thought of those places make my mind wonder and what incredible places they are.
I've recently really realised (alliteration MUCH?!) that England and where I live is pretty much crap and I just want to travel the world and meet many people from different cultures.
I wish I knew every language in the world, cause then I would become a translator so I could travel to these places, but saddly I'm crap at languages. So that plan is fail.

I was looking at a brouchure for college today! Excited, yes I am :D
Just get me there now!




p.s i love reading the comments, i'm getting! keep them coming, thank you!

Talent.

I wish I had some kind of talent, like drawing/painting or even singing.
I'm actually not good at anything specific. Someone give me something I could try out and become good at and gets lots of money? >.<

Well on a different note I have a job, should be getting £80 a month :D and I'm just really happy. YAY.

What will it take?

For you to notice when I'm upset? To be able to say sorry even though you have no idea what you've even done.
Lose this pride and this stupidity. Be there for me, care.
I just want you to do one thing, love me?
I can't even work up the guts to tell you all of this, I'm coward and I want you to figure it out for yourself.

10 Followers! ♥

Thank you so much everyone!
For the comments and following me, it's amazing. I really apperciate it.
Spread the word of my blog :)

Thank you again ♥

Sucker for sweet talk.

I'm not saying who this post is about.
I don't want these feelings to be confirmed, but I know deep down they are already confirmed.
I think I do have feelings for you, whenever I realise that you will always like her more than me, I feel a sharp pain of jealously right in the stomach.
I need and want your love.
Whenever your not around me I feel like I don't have fun and I can never stop thinking about you.
I want to hurt you all the time, shows how much I want you to care and tell me you love me but she will always come first.

I just want you to know I love you dearly and you mean a lot.

Piggy in the middle

Yes in the title I refered to myself as a pig. But I am literally playing piggy in the middle with the complaints of two friends.
Nicole on one side shooting insults at Kate on the other side who is not so innocent as she makes out to be.

I can't take all this fighting and being in the middle of it. I try to stay neutral but then one of them makes me angry, I hate best friends fighting. But they just can't seem to stop.

Someone help me.

My photography.

Opinions? Anything I could do better?

My homie ♥

This guy has been there for me whenever I needed him, he always makes me laugh and his cuddles are the best.
Even when he saw me on webcam crying he felt helpless because he wanted to do something and begged me to stop being sad. He shows that he really does care.
I hope he never walks out of my life like the rest of these 'best friends' (yes that was a snipe, lol)
Peter you're one adorable, incredible guy and I'm always there for you okay?



He'll never read this but I just had to mention how amazing he has been lately.
Oh and seriously isn't he the most adorable Asian you've ever seen?!